We have no lips!

A book review by Sashimi

For songs and adventures I have only praise

But I can't say the words that your silly cat says

Okay, so I read this book called Tailchaser's Song by Tad Williams--stole it off the humom's shelf. It's not like she'd notice; she's gone all day. It was all right, although those boy cats sure seemed awfully stuck on their, well, you know. Like that's the only think that separates boys from girls. Hello, we're better hunters, among other things.

Anyway, like I said, the adventures were all right, but this guy--obviously a human--who wrote the book, he made up a cat language where half the words had the letter "f" in them. Okay, maybe not half. But the word he used for girl cats ("fella," are you seeing the irony here?) definitely did. Now, I can type Fs all day long (or until Sushi and Ella kick me off the laptop), but I HAVE NO LIPS. PRONOUNCING THE LETTER "F" REQUIRES LIPS. Cats cannot say "fella." Our mouths don't work that way. We can't even say "food." That is why the first word we learn in human language is the one that brings the food to us without the letter "f":

Now.