Our First Poetry Submission!

My ears are pointed, my tail is long
but I'm a cat, so that's not wrong.
My paws are clean, my belly round,
I think the thoughts that are profound,
My mighty voice roars my eclat,
Better than lion, behold: the cat!

Submitted by: anonymous

Ella: You've got to be kidding me.

Sashimi: Mine! It rhymes, so I get it first. Back off, Ella!

Ella: I wouldn't touch it if you paid me.

Sashimi: Okay, MINE. So...the rhymes are mostly clean until that last couplet. Despite what Disney wants you to believe, "eclat" does not actually rhyme with "cat." My main problem here, though, is that the poem doesn't say anything. Yeah, okay, so you have pointy ears and a long tail--don't we all? We know your thoughts are profound and that you're better than a lion, because you've already stated in no uncertain terms that you're a cat. Well, duh. We know what cats are. Where's the angst? The wonder? The pathos? The glory? Sorry, anonymous, but you're about to be shredded into tasty, bite-sized strips. Sushi?

Sushi: I have to agree with your assessment, plus the scansion is forced in several places. This may be intentional, but with such a simple poem, its saving grace lies in the skill of the mechanics, or would if that skill wasn't lacking. Ella?

Sashimi: Ella?

Sushi: I think she went to check the food bowls.

Sashimi: SHRED!!!